Agency

The New York Times headline “agency” caught my eye in this article, as I tend to follow agency news working at a media & advertising agency. After reading the first few grafs of The Agency Moment, I quickly learned the piece was discussing a different type of agency.

The first Merriam-Webster definition of agency that I am familiar with is a business that provides a particular service, but the second was something interesting: the capacity, condition, or state of acting or of exerting power. 

The columnist David Brooks writes:

"Among the privileged, especially the privileged young, you see people who have been raised to be approval-seeking machines. They act active, busy and sleepless, but inside they often feel passive and not in control. Their lives are directed by other people’s expectations, external criteria and definitions of success that don’t actually fit them." 

“So many people are struggling for agency. They are searching for the solid criteria that will help them make their own judgments." 

"Agency is not automatic. It has to be given birth to, with pushing and effort…It’s having engraved inner criteria to guide action. The agency moment can happen at any age, or never. I guess that’s when adulthood starts.”

Take a moment to reflect on all of that, incredibly relevant to people in their 20s, and think of how it relates to you. 

Girls and their moms

In honor of Mother's Day, I wanted to comment on the relationship daughters have with their mothers in their 20s. About halfway through college, there was a noticeable difference in interactions between the majority of friends surrounding me and their moms. Freshmen year of college, people talked to their parents weekly, and sophomore year this grew just slightly. By junior and senior year, the vast majority of my friends were on the phone with their moms every day talking about anything and everything. Whether it was job & internship applications, questions about finances or drama with friends, Mom was there to listen.

Dependent or needy are not words I would use to describe my friends, but the role of family, especially moms, suddenly became stronger as girls entered their 20s. Hitting everyone to a different extent, the discernible growth in communication was true for me too and fascinates me to this day. So why does this happen? What spurs this uptick & development of the mother-daughter relationship? 

Mom is a neutral party, since other friends or family members might have a bit more bias. People sometimes think their friends will judge them, but you know your mom has your back and will always listen. She knows what's best for you and can read your instincts on things. She knows when to agree with you because it's what you want to hear, but if she disagrees with you, you don't get as upset as you do with others that you know. Sometimes when you call your mom, you want to share your stories but don't want to have to listen and reciprocate, as you do with people at your own level. She feels a sense of obligation and excitement when speaking with you, even if she is not fully attentive to the minute details of every story you share.

All of this builds up comfort levels and a relationship of co-dependence begins. Twenty-something girls start to think, "I can't live without my mom, and she can't live without me," which tends to be true. And although there will be fights or sometimes petty arguments, it's beautiful that this closeness exists. Happy Mother's Day to my mom all the Moms out there! Thanks for all you do! 

My mom and I!

Help a stranger out

When my friends and I left United Center on Monday, it was windy and snowing viciously. We all know I'm too cheap to call a cab, so of course we waited for the bus to take us back downtown, to then take the subway back north.

On the bus, I saw a family struggling to communicate with a young couple, as they all stared blankly at the Chicago Transit mobile application. Taking a quick glance at the family, something about their image just looked South American. I couldn't determine if it was the father that looked like he just smoked a pack of cigarettes, or the mismatched clothing on the sons…but didn't want to make any assumptions.

Moments later, I heard the word MICRO and knew instantaneously they were Argentine. "Micro" is a shortened word that porteños (Buenos Aires residents) use to describe their buses. I had to help these people out; my roommates and I had plenty of lost moments on buses in Buenos Aires.

I had to laugh at all of my immediate thoughts. Why are they here during there summer, when it's hot and sunny in Argentina and cold and snowy in Chicago? Oh, because it's their summer vacation and they have off of school. Why were they taking a bus in a city they barely know? Because that's what everyone does in Argentina. Why didn't they look up directions on a phone? Because they don't have unlimited data in the US or WiFi on a bus, idiot. 

They were asking me directions not to their hotel, but to Pizzeria Uno. Why did they want to go to Pizzeria Uno at 11:30 p.m. after a long night at the Bulls game? Because that's normal dinnertime in Argentina. 

I talked to the bus driver, used my iPhone maps and told them exactly where to get off (and how many blocks it was from the stop I got off at, so they wouldn't be lost alone). After chatting a bit, it was comforting immersing myself into conversation with a family from Argentina. They were from Belgrano (outer skirts of Buenos Aires), taking a "vacation" to Boston, Chicago, Las Vegas & LA, and the son and I shared a birthday. They even felt comfortable asking me to look up the weather for their flight to Boston the next day.

One of the more hilarious questions they asked (after we converted Fahrenheit to Celsius together so they could understand the weather) was why everyone in the US has iPhones instead of Samsungs. They seemed to be very perplexed by something as small as this!

Lesson of the day: You are a reflection on your country, and represent not only your family or city, but the United States. If no one helped these Argentines with directions, they would have talked about how rude Americans were, not necessarily how rude Chicagoans were. I'm still thankful for people that helped us with directions in Argentina, and can remember what the group of kids look like who told us to get off of a bus at the wrong stop because they thought it was funny.

A little bit goes a long way!

Lesson of the day: laugh at yourself

Sometimes, stupid things happen and rather than dwelling on them, you just have to laugh it off. I learned this yesterday, when I burned my forehead while trying to curl my hair with a 360 degree curling wand.

It's definitely visible. It's bruised. It probably burned off a layer of skin. It looks horrible. And a huge part of me wants to break out into tears at how upset I am about it.

But instead, I decided to hold it together by laughing at how ridiculous this is. An interesting yet functional coping mechanism, it seems to be working so far. Laughing at yourself feels like true transparency and gaining the ability to admit you've done something dumb…and aren't going to let it affect you forever. Try it out, and laugh with me!

A screenshot of the Snapchat I sent to some friends

Teamwork

As reflect on my college experience and lessons learned, I can't help but think of a group of people who really defined my last undergrad semester of college.

Team Maven after presentations this April

A significant part of my last spring semester in 2012 (about 200 hours) was spent working on my capstone project, a campaign for Mojo Ad. Mojo is the Missouri School of Journalism's student-run advertising agency, where we work to create three full-service campaigns for a national client. While my team worked on T.G.I. Friday's, here are some things I learned from the experience. 

1. Importance of relationships

Building a relationship with each team member on an individual level was vital to operating in the group. Whether it was chatting with them about a class, knowing who their boyfriend was or being familiar with their other commitments, this information became relevant to their work style. While there is a threshold that can be crossed, having these relationships made people want to be together and meet to work on our campaign.

2. Patience

Work must be productive if you want it to be completed with ten people in the room. Discussions required little interruptions and patience to develop the great ideas, because if someone was in a rush or felt anxious, everyone could tell and the feeling spread. 

3. Being concise

Making your point directly in a group conversation instead of beating around the bush when talking is incredibly important. Being on my Mojo team taught me to articulate well and think of things in terms of the key takeaway instead of the process of doing it.

4. Working together instead of silo-ing off 

My Mojo team met so much not to discuss what everyone's roles were doing, but to do work then and there. Instead of somewhere to talk about what we would do, we would sit with 2-4 people and crank out the content after discussing its purpose. This is where teamwork shined, whether we were working on a Google doc or collaborating to make a video. 

Because of exhibiting these behaviors and presenting our work in an engaging manner, my team won the internal competition of the best campaign! I'm still in touch with most of them today, and four of us were at the Career Fair on behalf of Mizzou or a company they work for. Thanks to Mojo for a great experience!

Hannah, Taylor, me and Lauren at the Meet & Greet reception before the Career Fair

2012: Life lessons learned

Between graduation, graduate school and starting a lot of new chapters of my life this year, it's been an incremental time for wisdom and the molding of important morals and lessons. Through education, experiences and friendship, here are some takeaways engrained in my head after this last year. Some of it might sound cynical, but it is what it is! Qué será será.

Be confident in yourself and your decisions - don't base things off of what others think. 
It's important to be aware of the rationale for the decisions you make. Having a one-line answer for most of life's important questions is a good way I have learned to be concise and answer tough questions. Why do you want to work here? Why do you want to live in this city? Why are you voting for this candidate?

If you don't have answers to these questions yourself before they are asked, you start to let others' thoughts and insults get to you. I had to keep my composure as someone told me in a public meeting that the $80,000+ fundraiser I ran was a flop, and respond immediately with why I participate in Relay For Life. I've listened to dozens of people tell me graduating early was stupid, and (if they even asked) tell them why I did it. This isn't even talking behind people's backs, this is people putting your life decisions down in front of your face. At the end of the day, we can't be pessimists and allow this commentary to let us down. Acknowledging and understanding the reasons we are doing things helps us get through these times, rationalize our time and find a sense of purpose in the world.

We know nothing. 
Whenever you think you have learned a lot, think about how much more there is out there that you don't know. I've been in multiple conversations alone this year that make me feel stupid and without knowledge, but that's how you learn. Whether conversations are religious or understanding the Evangelical Orthodox Church, learning how Alaskan residents get paid by the state or more Spanish vocabulary words, there is always more that you don't know.

International news matters. 

Meeting international students, traveling and studying how news events abroad disseminate throughout the US has taught me the importance of paying attention to international news. With funding cut for news hubs, small sections for this in the newspaper and little coverage in local news, it takes extra effort to learn about what is going on in other countries. But it can and will affect us and is important to know. 

Don’t join an organization that you cannot contribute anything to.

We should be past the point in our lives where we're doing mindless things as resume builders. Hence, joining a group you know you will not do the work for hurts everyone. It doesn't only make it bad for your sense of contribution or belonging to a group, but for the organization's operations. I was in a meeting of 30 people earlier this year for a student foundation at Mizzou and when asked for two volunteers for an event, no one in the room offered. There is no point of even having a club if no one wants to participate. Therefore, even if timing and conflict will arise between activities, discover why you are passionate about the organizations you are a part of so you still want to help them even when you're busy. 

People don't grow up.
Adults fight and create drama in their work environments. They hold grudges and have exclusive lunch and dinner dates with co-workers they trust or become friends with. 30-somethings still pretend it is someone's birthday at dinner to get a free dessert. Bosses play favorites and move others around for grave reasons. People steal. These and many other examples show that even adults settle to these levels of behavior!

A lot of people are selfish. 
There's nothing I value more than true selflessness. I haven't met many people who achieve this, but someone who can listen in a conversation and not contribute comments about their own lives are the most admirable out there.

We are at a time in our lives where everyone wants what is best for them. That could be serious things like the best job or relationship, simple decisions like the best time to go grocery shopping or even situational decisions like having control and exerting opinion. This is a lesson I can say I had a tough time grasping. If someone sent me an email, I could never stare at it and not respond. I get anxious if I don't reply to someone's call or text message within hours of it being received. I have learned to acknowledge that other people do not operate like this, and can leave your voicemail on their phone for a month without even listening to it. Ignore your text about lunch, or never deliver on what they said they would in an email. Everyone's definition of important and priorities are different, so know that people do what is best for them.

Make a commitment & enjoy time with your friends

A lot of people say that the way we socialize is different these days. Making plans through texting, tweeting our every move or Facebook chatting people you would never acknowledge in a crowd are definitely normal occurrences. This surplus of ways to connect gives us so many outlets for information overload that we set high expectations in our own plans with our friends.

I see this happen with my friends at home, school, groups of Greek people, other interns and even my friends' friends. One person (or group of people) initiates a hangout, dinner or party and others "commit." Every invitee considers their RSVP pending until the event starts. So when the actual event approaches, it's time to figure out what the scene's like, who is there, if it's fun and if the people there deem it worth your time (all decided via text messages, of course). And if it appears to be 'happening' or a group of people you like are there- you go. If not, you skip out.

There are plenty of inherent flaws with this routine.

• Our lack of commitment. The definition of commit has changed. "Attending" on Facebook is a loose term, telling someone in a text message that you'll stop by or make an appearance is polite, and you can only really depend on your best friends to be there with you. We need to learn what it is to make a promise, commitment or trust will never exist.
• Everyone has different definitions of fun. The tweets and statuses being posted reflect only one person's point of view. Only you know who you are compatible with and how you connect to others in social settings. What could be the night of your life could be incredibly boring to one of your best friends. 
• Most importantly, you're letting someone else down. Just because you aren't incredibly close with someone doesn't give you permission to be deceptive. Committing gets someone else excited to host something, they spend their resources trying to please you and the rest of a large group, and when you don't show up, you're hurting them--it's not just on your own terms of making a decision.

We must learn that it doesn't matter who else is there. When someone invites you somewhere, consider the purpose of why you do (or don't) want to attend. Then provide an honest answer- don't lead people on. When you aren't too pleased to be going somewhere, think: what were you expecting to happen? Who did you secretly hope will show up? What made the group boring or fun? That's why knowing your intentions before going in is helpful. If someone bores you that much or feels like such a forced part of your routine, think about what traits that person or group has that makes you want to put in the time, effort and resources to be their friend.

Some of the most exciting times in your life will be those spontaneous situations where it didn't matter who you were with- you had a great time. This is what I plan to remember as I enter my last year of college--prioritizing who to spend time with, where to show up and not trying to make it all or please everyone.  When you attend parties for acquaintances or classmates you might not keep in touch with later in life, go happily and enjoy their presence, but make your RSVP clear to be a reputable person. Figure out who your real friends are and give them the respect they deserve-- because you don't want to take the opportunity to have time with the people you're closest with for granted.

Time flies by

I can't decide if summer goes by faster when you're at home--mainly staying in one place--or exploring new territory. In the past, I've had more extended travel experiences that broke off the summer into segments, and now, any travel I plan is on weekends for quick trips out of town. Living in other cities for those longer periods of time requires adjustment time and sometimes has felt slow, but you always leave feeling like there was more to do and how the experience flew by. Being at home, in Chicago for that matter, has given me a different concept of time. A different mindset than I have while I'm at school or traveling.

At school, I'm always mentally ahead of where I need to be, logistics-wise. My schedule has always revolved around others--classes, meetings, activities & friends--and you have to keep yourself up to speed. At the end of every night, all of my stuff is put away and I'm prepared to start off fresh in the morning, ready to go for the next day's plans. Sleep is irrelevant, because my outfit needs to be laid out, transportation planned & the day is on a pretty strict timeline. I guess you could call it living for the future.

At home, I'm living in the present. Waking up, getting on the train, conquering the ~hour commute to work each way, working the 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. life, having some sort of social plans and suddenly, it's 10 p.m. already. Go to bed, rinse, lather, repeat. Just kidding, but the process goes on. I often feel like I never left work once I return there in the morning. Each week goes by as its own entity, each weekend after, and the cycle continues. Suddenly, three weeks of relaxation and six weeks in the work force have gone by. I've rarely slept for more than six hours on any night and can't seem to catch a break. Unfortunately, as a result, I feel like I'm constantly falling behind on my own goals and living in rewind. 

But just because I haven't gotten to achieve my to do list of scrapbooking, cleaning or completing other long term projects doesn't mean it hasn't been an enjoyable summer. Forcing myself to do one of these things instead of taking up spontaneous plans would contradict living in the present. Catching up with an old friend or high school acquaintance on the train might be more valuable than rushing to read a book to cross it off of a list. Visiting Milwaukee, Champaign, Kansas City, Mexico & San Diego in the past few weeks has been incredibly fun, even if I haven't vacuumed my room but stare at that instruction on my to do list daily. I enjoy quality time with high school and college friends-in person, oh the phone or via email-- and it's great.

So will this worldview of living in the present translate to my graduate school career? Or will I need to revert back to planning SO FAR ahead? I'll have my own bedroom (and bathroom!) for the first time and will already have plans you on more of your own time instead of what it's like living with roommates. Two semesters will already go by quickly, but do you make more out of it by living in the present, the future or a combination of the two? I guess we will see as time goes on!

Sorority Experience

As the end of the school year approached, one tradition common in most Greek chapters is that the upcoming graduates are given an opportunity to say one last goodbye before receiving their alumni status. Phi Mu holds a ceremony for this, typically at our last chapter meeting, and it is always very emotional. You reflect upon your memories, sorority leadership experiences and what your membership has taught you over the years. 

The Phi Mu seniors before our ceremony

The week this happened, one of my friends in another sorority said something very meaningful about this transition. She explained, “The person you were freshman year when you joined the sorority is completely different than who you are now.” After hearing this, the statement constantly ran through my head as I thought of how I and my friends had changed since Bid Day the Saturday before freshman year of college. It was so accurate- I AM a totally different and developed individual than I was in August of 2009. 

Some friends and I before my last Phi Mu formal

Then, I thought I would graduate in four years. Everyone in my pledge class's potential had yet to be measured, and leadership opportunities were free reign. Where one would go, what she would pursue and what direction it would take her in was all up for question. Who your core "group" of friends would be within the sisterhood had yet to be determined. And three years later, with these speeches, it all comes together.

You wish your friends the best in their transitions, reflect on accomplishments and head in new directions. I can leave Phi Mu knowing how I can help serve in the future, knowing who I want to stay in touch with and having an amazing pledge family I never would have thought I would be blessed with. I can walk around the house confidently, happily take photos by the mantle and sit in the dining room without hesitation of not knowing the name of the girl next to me. I am the one answering younger members' questions and not asking. I can talk about my experiences serving on dozens of committees and working as public relations chair, vice president and sisterhood relations chairman in job interviews and explain how much I learned about work ethic and more. 

me, Alex and Emily smiling in the Formal Living Room

As you progress through your years in a sorority or Greek chapter, or any organization for that matter, think about how you've changed since Day 1. Did you accomplish what you set out to? Gain what you wanted from your membership? Did you fulfill the organization's mission and represent the group well? If not, go do it. You'll only have limited time before your active years go away and alumni status begins :).   

A feminist rant

When I return home or am catching up with friends I do not go to school with, one question comes up without fail each time: "What's your boy situation?" Note: the question is not "do you have a boyfriend?" We live in a society where that information is already on Facebook, so since it didn't provide enough information, we need the whole situation. It implies that a situation even exists. Other common questions include:

"How are the boys? Are you seeing anyone? Any interests? Why don't you have a boyfriend?"
And these are completely normal questions to come home to. From friends, family, people at church, etc. And I want to propose a question that stems from this. 
Does a woman's well-being reflect her relationship status? Why should it? I really have tried to see it from both sides.

If you're in a relationship...

• You value another person's life
• Can balance your time well  
• Supposedly have marriage and a future on your radar
• You have another individual to support you, emotionally and in your life  

If you're not in a relationship...

• More time for yourself- independence 
• At times, more time to focus on your education and work goals
• Can emphasize your relationships with friends and might try more to stay in touch with acquaintances

Clearly, these lists are not complete. Either way, relationship or not: you're going somewhere and moving forward in life- whether it be promotions in the workplace, marriage, etc. So why do we judge a woman on whether she has a man to support her?

A woman can be perfectly competent and successful without a boyfriend. A lot of effort, time and energy goes into the obligation to put someone else's life at the same level as yours. But people need to wait for the right person or opportunity to be there and the right time in their life, not just date to say they're dating. We live in an ambitious and goal-driven world; nevertheless, people are selfish and don't always want to date someone just to have someone for mutual support and a relationship. So we should respect the fact that this is acknowledged nowadays and realize that someone's status as a person is not dependent on their relationship status.

Why doesn't anyone ever ask what you are doing with your professional goals or at school? You could be the CEO of a company, and would have to ease that into conversation since you're not talking about a relationship. I guarantee you that people at home don't know that I'm chairing a philanthropy event that fundraises over $100,000, working for a full-service advertising agency and served on the planning committee for my university's Centennial Homecoming. But they do know I am single!

Moreover, how many BOYS are judged on whether they have a girlfriend? Envision this situation. A 28 year-old man comes home to his hometown and shares news that he has been named president of a company. Now picture this- a 28 year-old woman has been given the same title. And people will still say- "Darn, too bad she doesn't have a husband."

I encourage you to look at boys the same way you do with girls as they achieve their goals. I encourage you to acknowledge your friends and family members' accomplishments and life goals just as much as their relationship status. And I encourage all women to realize that they don't need a man to stay stable, and that good things come to those who wait.

StrengthsQuest

Today, I took a StrengthsQuest, a test for students and staff to identify and apply talents for teamwork and career success. StrengthsQuest has a good reputation and has always produced accurate results, and I was very impressed after taking it last summer. My strengths after these results were:

Communication

Focus

Woo (Win others over)

Responsibility

Individualization

And all of the descriptions were fitting. But today I received an access code to take the exam for an organization I'm involved in at school and received pretty different results. Drastic in my mind, but still very relative.

My 5 strengths in order were:

Learner

Input

Arranger

Responsibility

Achiever

Note: Only one of these is the same. I guess I'm no more or less responsible than I was a year ago. Kidding, but glad responsibility is a trait that I've maintained.

But analyzing the results and reading the personalized descriptions, I realize that my strengths have changed in part due to my experience in the past year- specifically studying abroad in Argentina. My sophomore year was a big one- I solidified my college friendships, became vice president of my sorority, gained positions on numerous committees, traveled and decided to graduate a year early. Studying abroad was after all of that, and living in one of the world's biggest cities and working my first internship are probably other things that contributed to a development in my strengths and weaknesses. Taking 12 credit hours in 10 weeks really did make me a learner, my need for productivity and continuous improvement does make me an arranger and my desire to get a word into everything does in fact fit with input. A need for achievement outlines a competitive sense. Below are the five 'strengths' and some descriptions. Reading them might teach you what you might be!

Learner

People who are especially talented in the Learner theme have a great desire to learn and want

to continuously improve. In particular, the process of learning, rather than the outcome,

excites them. By nature, you occasionally promise yourself to do certain things better in the future. Perhaps

you study the linkages between final outcomes and the factors leading up to them. As a result,

you may identify a few enhancements you need to make in yourself, in someone else, in a

process, or in a plan. Instinctively, you probably started asking people questions as a child

and continue to do so today. Others quickly notice you are genuinely interested in what they

say. Your inquiries turn tense frowns into relaxed smiles. The warmth of your presence can

transform a timid person into a talkative one. You intentionally offer compliments. Few

things delight you as much as hearing a stranger say, “I really like you — and I’ve just met

you!” It’s very likely that you may ponder options rather than react without thinking through

things. Sometimes you weigh the ramifications, consequences, outcomes, or effects.

Sometimes you aim to understand the basic “whys” and “hows” of a situation, problem, or

opportunity. Individuals might trust you to be cautious. They might expect you to raise

important issues that require further consideration. Driven by your talents, you have the extra

energy to work hard whenever you are acquiring information to broaden your base of

knowledge. You desire to deepen your understanding of various topics, opportunities,

problems, solutions, situations, events, or people. Chances are good that you thirst for new

ideas and knowledge. Often you lose yourself in a book. You pore over the ideas contained

on its pages for long stretches of time. Why? You want to absorb as much information as you

can.

Input

People who are especially talented in the Input theme have a craving to know more. Often

they like to collect and archive all kinds of information. By nature, you can simplify the most complex, convoluted, or intricate procedure. People usually rely on you to offer clear and easy-to-comprehend explanations. Driven by your

talents, you may impress others as well-versed in a certain subject. Maybe you have invested

time acquiring the sophisticated or technical vocabulary used by experts. When your

teammates hear you speak or read your writing, some assume you know more than they do.

Occasionally this is the case. Specific people may allow you to run meetings, make decisions,

or solve problems. Sometimes they just step back and let you take charge. It’s very likely that

you sometimes use academic-sounding words to talk about your ideas or areas of expertise.

Perhaps you have invested time in broadening your vocabulary by looking up words in the

dictionary and committing their meanings to memory. Chances are good that you are

determined to push for changes that will benefit humankind or Earth itself. Your desire to

have an impact motivates you to enter into conversations with intelligent people. Drawing on

their wealth of knowledge and ideas as well as sharing your treasure trove of wisdom is

exciting. These discussions frequently cause you to think in new ways and to reexamine your

purpose in life. Because of your strengths, you like systems or rules because they produce

uniform, consistent, and predictable results every time. This is especially useful when

individuals must perform the same task in the same way over and over again. Being an

organized thinker, you are apt to lead others through step-by-step presentations about

processes or regulations.

Arranger

People who are especially talented in the Arranger theme can organize, but they also have a

flexibility that complements this ability. They like to figure out how all of the pieces and

resources can be arranged for maximum productivity. Instinctively, you may gravitate to activities that require teamwork or collaboration to get the job done. Perhaps you enjoy coordinating the schedule or managing available human and material resources. You sometimes enjoy immersing yourself in your work or studies. By

nature, you are impelled to deliver on all of your commitments. You are determined to meet

all of your obligations. Doing so is your badge of honor. It is one reason why people describe

you as trustworthy and dependable. Because of your strengths, you exhibit a heightened

awareness of your talents. One of your top priorities is building upon these natural abilities to

create strengths. You undoubtedly find opportunities to practice using your talents in new and

different ways. Chances are good that you are aware of what you do naturally and well. You

prefer to leverage your talents rather than spend time trying to overcome your shortcomings.

You expect excellence from yourself and others. Being average at best and mediocre at worst

is unacceptable to you. Driven by your talents, you might derive pleasure from being on

certain teams. Why? Sometimes you just want to help your partners figure out what they can

contribute to the project. Sometimes you lend a hand coordinating human and material

resources. Sometimes you step into situations where one more pair of hands means the

difference between success and failure.

Responsibility

People who are especially talented in the Responsibility theme take psychological ownership

of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and

loyalty. By nature, you do much more than just try to live up to your commitments. You persist

working until you can deliver on your promises. This certainly enhances your reputation for

being trustworthy, reliable, and dependable. Driven by your talents, you are naturally open

and honest about who you are, what you have done, what you can do, and what you cannot

do. Your straightforward explanations and stories help listeners see you as you see yourself.

You reveal your strengths and limitations. You are forthright and plainspoken. People

generally seek your company and want to work with you. Many are impelled to move into

action by your words and examples. Instinctively, you yearn to be given additional duties.

You expect to be held accountable for your productivity, profit, behavior, comments, and

actions. It’s very likely that you may enjoy hearing people describe you as more serious than

some of your colleagues, classmates, teammates, friends, or coworkers. Because of your

strengths, you might shoulder your obligations and duties with relative ease. You might be

motivated to behave in ways that cause individuals to say you are dependable.

Achiever

People who are especially talented in the Achiever theme have a great deal of stamina and

work hard. They take great satisfaction from being busy and productive. Instinctively, you might expend more physical or mental energy doing your job or pursuing your studies than some of your peers do. Perhaps you need to make measurable progress toward one or two goals each day to feel successful as a human being. Because of your

strengths, you possess the physical and mental endurance to withstand hardships as well as

stress. Characteristically you work harder and longer than most people are capable of doing.

Driven by your talents, you regularly dedicate your energy and personal time to various

issues, causes, or projects. You harbor a deep-seated desire to have a good influence on the

planet and its people. Your goal is simple: “I want to leave the world in a lot better shape than

I found it.” By nature, you tend to be a very good adviser to many individuals. When offering

suggestions or asking questions, you probably are much more engaged, intense, and involved

than usual. Chances are good that you repeatedly go out of your way to support, inspire,

motivate, or embolden various individuals. You likely regard this task as worthy of your

effort and time.

13 Dimensions of Oral Assessment

At the US Embassy briefing, the foreign service officers presented the criteria on which they are judged during their oral assessment. Reviewing these qualities reminds you of vital life skills that can be applied to just about anything! Job interviews, being a student, leadership positions...check them out.

1. Composure. To stay calm, poised, and effective in stressful or difficult situations; to think on one's feet, adjusting quickly to changing situations; to maintain self-control.
2. Cultural Adaptability. To work and communicate effectively and harmoniously with persons of other cultures, value systems, political beliefs, and economic circumstances; to recognize and respect differences in new and different cultural environments.
3. Experience and Motivation. To demonstrate knowledge, skills or other attributes gained from previous experience of relevance to the Foreign Service; to articulate appropriate motivation for joining the Foreign Service.
4. Information Integration and Analysis. To absorb and retain complex information drawn from a variety of sources; to draw reasoned conclusions from analysis and synthesis of available information; to evaluate the importance, reliability, and usefulness of information; to remember details of a meeting or event without the benefit of notes.
5. Initiative and Leadership. To recognize and assume responsibility for work that needs to be done; to persist in the completion of a task; to influence significantly a group's activity, direction, or opinion; to motivate others to participate in the activity one is leading.
6. Judgment. To discern what is appropriate, practical, and realistic in a given situation; to weigh relative merits of competing demands.
7. Objectivity and Integrity. To be fair and honest; to avoid deceit, favoritism, and discrimination; to present issues frankly and fully, without injecting subjective bias; to work without letting personal bias prejudice actions.
8. Oral Communication. To speak fluently in a concise, grammatically correct, organized, precise, and persuasive manner; to convey nuances of meaning accurately; to use appropriate styles of communication to fit the audience and purpose.
9. Planning and Organizing. To prioritize and order tasks effectively, to employ a systematic approach to achieving objectives, to make appropriate use of limited resources.
10. Quantitative Analysis. To identify, compile, analyze and draw correct conclusions from pertinent data; to recognize patterns or trends in numerical data; to perform simple mathematical operations.
11. Resourcefulness. To formulate creative alternatives or solutions to resolve problems, to show flexibility in response to unanticipated circumstances.
12. Working With Others. To interact in a constructive, cooperative, and harmonious manner; to work effectively as a team player; to establish positive relationships and gain the confidence of others; to use humor as appropriate.
13. Written Communication. To write concise, well organized, grammatically correct, effective and persuasive English in a limited amount of time.

Source: http://fsot.wikidot.com/the-oral-exam

Día del Amigo- Friend's Day!

Friendship is one of my favorite things in the entire world. There is nothing that makes me happier than spending time with and keeping in touch with the people I love, and knowing that they are happy.

Wikipedia accurately sums up the values of friendship as the following, fitting very well with my definitions:

• Tendency to desire what is best for each other
• Sympathy and empathy
• Honesty
• Mutual understanding and compassion
• Trust
• Positive reciprocity

Today, South America is celebrating Día del Amigo, Friend's Day, ironically enough, on my half birthday! I wasn't too familiar with what the holiday was except from advertisements, until a lunch conversation at work yesterday. My co-workers were shocked to hear that the USA does not have anything really comparable to this, at least societally-noted and celebrated.

Wikipedia describes it as the following:

Día del Amigo (Spanish, Friend's Day) is a celebration of friendship, held annually on July 20 in South American countries including Argentina, Chile, Paraguay, and Uruguay.

In Argentina, Friend's Day is often a good excuse for a common friendly gathering, though people also employ the day to get in contact with old and seldom-met friends and greet them. …The gatherings tend to happen during the evening.

Friend's Day has in recent years it has turned into a very popular mass phenomenon. In 2005, too many well-wishing friends led to a temporary breakdown of the mobile phone network in the cities of Buenos Aires, Mendoza, Córdoba and Rosario. …Seats in most restaurants, bars and other establishments are already booked out completely a week before the celebration.

The idea for Friend's Day goes back to Argentine teacher, musician, and dentist Enrique Febbraro, who lobbied to turn the anniversary of the first moon landing into an international day of friendship, along with his Rotary Club de Once, Buenos Aires. He argued that on this particular day, the whole world had been friends of the three astronauts. The first official recognition of the day came with decree No. 235/79 by the government of Buenos Aires Province, which authorized the celebration and gave it official nature.

I say this a lot, but I have the best friends in the world. Looking at these pictures does not fully explain how special each and every one of you is to me, and how nice it is to know I always have someone to talk to. Whether I'm skyping someone from Argentina, making plans at home or school, talking on the phone or going on adventures, it's the people and not the conversation or events that make it for me. Having people to trust with your thoughts, share experiences and listen to is a special thing. Excited to observe how Friend's day is celebrated, I reflected on some of my fondest memories with my friends. I might be crying of happiness as I post this, but here we go.

FRIENDSHIP IS...

Going to St. Louis together Labor Day weekend to catch up from the summer

and cheer on Mizzou at the Illinois game

Building houses at Project Mexico for a month

where you meet and forever keep in touch with

some of the greatest people in your lives

Eating with your sorority sisters after chapter

to debrief and comment on everything that just happened

Sleeping in a hotel room in downtown Chicago with 17 girls,

because you want each one of them there

Celebrating New Years' with your best friends

then forever lying to your friend's mom

Traveling through Argentina together

and picking each other up while you fall

the first time you all try to ski
Going downstairs on midnight on your birthday

to see that your best friends trekked over to your house

in the snow to sing Happy Birthday and share some cake

Having all the people you love come to your birthday

dinner on a school night even after the original reservation

was cancelled because of snowstorms

Coming home for Sts. Peter & Paul's 50th Anniversary

and Greek dancing all night with all of your church friends
Road tripping to the Michigan Dunes for

ultimate relaxation and an annual catch-up

Having the opportunity to celebrate Orthodox Christian Easter

not only with your family, but also three of your best friends

who care enough to go to Chicago and attend a midnight church service

Valuing every minute you have together, even if it's

the one day you see each other all summer before taking off

for different countries, summer and future lifestyles

Love you all!

Feliz Día del Amigo &

Happy Friend's Day

to all of my best friends out there!