Girls and their moms

In honor of Mother's Day, I wanted to comment on the relationship daughters have with their mothers in their 20s. About halfway through college, there was a noticeable difference in interactions between the majority of friends surrounding me and their moms. Freshmen year of college, people talked to their parents weekly, and sophomore year this grew just slightly. By junior and senior year, the vast majority of my friends were on the phone with their moms every day talking about anything and everything. Whether it was job & internship applications, questions about finances or drama with friends, Mom was there to listen.

Dependent or needy are not words I would use to describe my friends, but the role of family, especially moms, suddenly became stronger as girls entered their 20s. Hitting everyone to a different extent, the discernible growth in communication was true for me too and fascinates me to this day. So why does this happen? What spurs this uptick & development of the mother-daughter relationship? 

Mom is a neutral party, since other friends or family members might have a bit more bias. People sometimes think their friends will judge them, but you know your mom has your back and will always listen. She knows what's best for you and can read your instincts on things. She knows when to agree with you because it's what you want to hear, but if she disagrees with you, you don't get as upset as you do with others that you know. Sometimes when you call your mom, you want to share your stories but don't want to have to listen and reciprocate, as you do with people at your own level. She feels a sense of obligation and excitement when speaking with you, even if she is not fully attentive to the minute details of every story you share.

All of this builds up comfort levels and a relationship of co-dependence begins. Twenty-something girls start to think, "I can't live without my mom, and she can't live without me," which tends to be true. And although there will be fights or sometimes petty arguments, it's beautiful that this closeness exists. Happy Mother's Day to my mom all the Moms out there! Thanks for all you do! 

My mom and I!